Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Life is a Dance

I feel like being a little girl and a grown-up girl at the same time.

Part of me wants desperately to run and play somewhere... tumble and feel the earth under me. I want to be like Pocahontas running through the trees then diving into clear water... moving where the wind takes me and feeling the breath taken out of me at the sight of God's glorious beauty.

On the other hand...
The sun is setting, it's quiet outside, and I have music running through my heart. I smile as I think about writing love songs and sipping a cup of tea on the porch swing, guitar in hand. Put my glasses on, snuggle under a blanket...

Life has taken me captive.

All of me just wants to fall in love with life.

Which woman am I?
I think I'm a little bit of both. Elements of so many passions reside in this heart.
I long for adventure, yet my soul stirs in the quiet places.
One place I express the facets of me is through dance.
I love to give everything... every particle of energy, every snippet of my colors, and every thread of my being in a dance for my Lover...

A song I have yet to put to music:

I love Him softly with the pretty pieces of my heart.
Lay down shades of pink and weeping for the love that overcomes me.
Taken wholly with the movement.
Grace surrounding.
Up, through,
Eyes clear,
Follow this Lion.

Mystery and revelation flood my senses.
The aroma of His vineyard makes me laugh in wonder
Who is this that makes me feel like clay under His tender hand?
He rises with the morning and fills my life with light.
Oh, touch me again... this love is overwhelming.

I laugh, I love, I dance.
Through You, my breath takes flight
My feet are free with the wind
You are my ribbon of delight

I love Him boldly with the valiant pieces of my heart.

His eyes pierce mine and we go round and round.
I dance in awe of His might.
Strength surrounding.
Abandon, Release,
He is here,
Revere this Lion.

Come under His hand and allow my heart to be inspired.
Unhindered passion comes from a well inside.
I draw from the depths and come alive.

I laugh, I love, I dance.
Through You, my breath takes flight
My feet are free with the wind
You are my ribbon of delight

Friday, March 02, 2007

Little Steps

I feel like I'm emerging out of a dry-ish season. Or I very soon will be.

I've been struggling with feeling alive lately. I feel like I'm not truly living out of my deepest heart of hearts.

Now, if you know Jessica, you know that I am a very passionate person. I am excited and exuberant over almost everything. I love being like that... it's so much a part of who I am. I feel alive when I love things. :)

Like so many others, I've been ruined. I've tasted love and life and now, anything less leaves me unsatisfied.

Right now, I want to feel wholly and completely engaged. I want to know who I am, and live as that woman. I want to sing because I'm happy. I want to smile like I have a secret I want to share. I want to randomly get the urge to go on a barefoot adventure. This is what being alive means to me. I want to love the men in my life and encourage them to become true men by being a woman. I want to speak to my sisters and lovingly guide them to their Creator. I want to be a blessing to my family. I want to know with my entire being that God is good, He's big, and He loves me.

I know God has me walking through this season for a purpose... there's newness coming. I've experienced some of it already. God is giving me
  • new dance
  • new music
  • a new voice
  • and a new perspective.

"Though I turn away, your mercy brings me back to you again... You draw me closer. You draw me in."

- You Draw Me Closer - Brent Helming -

Thank you Jesus for this time.